In China, there is an important "3A principle" in social etiquette——acceptance, attention, and agreement.
One. Introduction etiquette
Between the host and the guest, the host first introduced; between the elders and juniors, the juniors first introduce; between men and women, the men first introduced; those who want to get acquainted with each other first introduce thems
Introduction in the middle
Introduction in the middle is the process of acquaintance introduced by others.
1. Who is the center introducer
The hostess is the introducer during family gatherings; the counterpart is the introducer during social activities, and the professional person is the introducer during official activities.
2. The etiquette sequence of the center introduction
Between the host and the guest, introduce the host first; between the elders and the juniors, first introduce the juniors; between the superior and the subordinate, introduce the subordinate first; Between the high-ranking and the low-ranking, introduce the low-ranking first.
1. Introduction to the collective and the collective
The two groups generally introduce the low-status group first, and then the high-status group. Low-status is generally the host, and high-status is generally the guest.
2.Introduction between collective and individual
First, introduce the low-status, and then introduce the high-status.
The order of introduction of the opening characters of the conference: When holding various conferences, first introduce the high-ranking and high-powered people, and then introduce the low-ranking and low-powered people in turn.
Notes on Introduction
- When introducing others, pay attention to the order. Men should be introduced to women first, young ones to older ones, low-status ones to high-status ones, unmarried women to married women, and children to adults.
- As the person being introduced, you should show enthusiasm for getting to know each other and look at each other. Except for women and the elderly, they should generally stand up when being introduced. At the banquet table and the conference table, you only need to smile and nod.
- Introduce specific people with respectful words, such as "Miss Wang, please allow me to introduce to you, this is Mr. Liu". At the same time, you should politely signal with your hands instead of pointing with your fingers.
Two. Handshake etiquette
The order of handshake
- Between the superior and the subordinate, after the superior reach out, the subordinate moves forward to take over;
- Between 2 guests and the host, the host should stretch out his hand to the guest first when the guest arrives, and stretch out his hand first when the guest leaves;
- Between the elders and the younger generations, the younger generations wait for the elders to reach out and then hold;
- Between men and women, men and other women stretch out their hands before holding;
- Between married and unmarried, the unmarried person waits for the married person to reach out and hold it.
Notes on handshake
- The strength of the handshake should be slightly harder, as long as you don't hold the other party's hand. Generally, you don't need to shake hands hard, just hold it. Westerners tend to lightly hold women's fingers, except for old friends.
- The length of the handshake time can be flexibly controlled according to the intimacy of both parties. The first meeting is usually within 3 seconds, too short a time is mistaken for arrogance and perfunctory. Handshake of the opposite sex should not be too long.
- The standard for a handshake is to walk to 1m away from the opponent, stand upright with both legs, lean forward slightly, extend the right hand, palm vertical to the ground, put four fingers together, open the thumb and hold the opponent.
- The tip of the handshake is slightly downward, and gently shaken up and down three or four times, then release the hand to restore the original shape. When shaking hands, look attentive, warm, friendly, and natural, with a smile on your face, look at each other's eyes and greet each other at the same time.
- Handshake taboo dirty hands, wet hands, absent-mindedness, not taking off gloves, holding with the left hand, cross handshake, refusal to shake hands, small movements, clenching, rubbing hands, shaking, copying pockets with one hand, holding cigarettes, etc.
Three. Visiting etiquette
The invitation etiquette before the visit
Regardless of whether you are visiting for business or private purposes, you must contact the respondent by phone in advance. There are four main points of contact:
- Self-reported family name, unit, and position.
- Ask the respondent if he is at his work unit, if he has the time or when he has time.
- The content of the interview is proposed. An incidental visit or a courtesy visit prepares the other party.
- 4 With the consent of the other party, set a specific time and place for the visit. Take care to avoid eating and resting, especially the time for a nap. Finally, thank the other party.
The manners and etiquette during the visit
- Be punctual and keep promises
- Pay attention to the art of knocking on the door. Use your index finger to knock on the door with moderate intensity and three times in an orderly interval. Wait for the response. If there is no response, you can use a little more force and knock three times. If there is a response, stand sideways and hide again. On the side of the right door frame, when the door opens, take a half step forward and face the owner.
- The host does not give up the seat and cannot sit down casually. If a host is an elderly person or superior, and the host does not sit, he cannot sit first. After the host gives up his seat, he must say "Thank you", and then sit down in proper etiquette. The host passes the cigarette. Take the tea with both hands and express gratitude. If the host does not have the habit of smoking, he must restrain his addiction and try not to smoke as much as possible to show respect for the host’s habits. The host offers the fruit and waits for the elderly or other guests to do it. Take it again. Even in the home of the most familiar friend, don't be too casual.
- Talk to the host and be polite.
- The conversation time should not be too long. When you stand up and leave, you must express to the owner: "I'm sorry". After going out, turn around and take the initiative to shake hands with the owner, saying: "Please stay." After the owner stays, take a few steps and then look back and wave your hand. Tribute: "Goodbye".
Four. Address etiquette
The address is the first word spoken in people's interactions, and it is a passport to start building good interpersonal relationships.
1. Different types of address
Addressing is used very frequently in business and social interactions, and there are many types of addressing, but it is often embarrassing because of improper addressing, and accurate addressing is conducive to communication and exchanges. Therefore, we must first be clear about the categories of titles: by name, by job title, by occupation, by a pronoun, by tradition, and so on.
2. The order of address
Everyone wants to be respected by others, and courtesy addressing is also a way to express respect. We must not only address others with the correct attitude and respect but also understand some of the honorable names commonly used in life, such as You, noble, virtuous, respectable, etc.
3. Attention on address
Pay attention to your own voice when addressing others. The volume is moderate, the tone is gentle and enthusiastic. At the same time, the expression and posture should be more generous and calm. If we call different people on the same occasion, there are obvious changes in tone and tone, which can easily cause misunderstanding by others.
* Etiquette taboo
【Don't talk without words】
There is no word in words, but it's just a momentary convenience and lip service. In the long run, if you lose the trust of others, you lose your greatest capital.
【Don't hurt people with bad words】
When the opponent's temper is on the verge of triggering, avoid temporarily so that the opponent can't find the person to vent, and gradually eliminate the fire. Avoidance does not mean "compromise" but gives the other party a chance to think calmly, and at the same time proves one's own self-cultivation.
【Communicate in time to eliminate conflicts】
Bad words are difficult to avoid. It is best to sit down and communicate calmly before the incident or after the symptoms occur, to eliminate misunderstandings or contradictions between the two parties and avoid the appearance of bad words.
【Don't get angry casually】
It is easy to damage your body when you are angry. The average life expectancy of irritable people is significantly lower than that of normal people, they are more likely to age, and they will hurt each other's harmony. Therefore, when you encounter problems, you must calmly think, learn to "transpose" thinking, and calmly consider from the other side's perspective.
Walking rumors behind the back will not only hurt the friendship between friends or colleagues, but will even lead to the consequences of antagonism, and it also reflects low character. So do: Don't interfere with other people's privacy, don't spread gossip, and don't gloat at others' faults.
【Don't make excessive jokes】
It's common to make jokes, but be moderate. We can grasp from several aspects: a cheerful, generous person, a little more jokes, can make the atmosphere more active. Those who are cautious, don't make or even joke less. The opposite sex, especially women, must be joking appropriately.
Don't make jokes about other people's names, or make random calls or nicknames. Respect, leader, joking must be based on maintaining the dignity of the other party. Don't joke in some sad, unhappy atmospheres or occasions where others are concentrating on one's mind, solemn gatherings, or major social events. Even if you are joking, you should also pay attention to content that is healthy, humorous, and elegant. Don't make jokes about other people's defects, don't make vulgar, indecent jokes.